Monthly Review: March 2021

I've been away from this space for quite some time now - quite some time if you considered the frequency I've published in 2020. 

My lifestyle took a drastic change; I've been recalibrating my priorities, adjusting how I view life in general and how I've have been doing things. I long for that sense of epiphany again. 

Additionally, I've had a few personal milestones. For one, I'm finally able to drive on my own after having a Class 3 driving's licence for more than half a decade (thank you, me or really, my dad who decided I should be driving), I had the chance to sit at the adult table at work (pretty fun) and I rekindled with an old hobby of mine. I learned to rest, like, completely doing utter nothingness kind of rest.

I learned how to focus on what was important to me, oxymoronically this was a hard topic for me, it was hard to realise for that matter. It felt for a period of time, I was really going through the motion, I had a personal fear that I would wind up becoming that half-hearted lazy person I was during my adolescent years.. that I didn't live up to my potential, that I was afraid of having lost years again. Perhaps I got too carried away with that thought, to a point it got exhausting. 

What or who am I trying to prove? Honestly, no one really gives a ****.

In the short span of 2021, there were quite a number of key lessons I've picked up. I thought I would document them in this space in case I would like to revisit them again (God knows I never ever read my handwritten journals, ever, thanks to ugly handwriting).

1) A tool is only useful if you know how to use it

Saw this on my friend's blog, and dang it was true af. In such a fast paced era we live that has been becoming increasingly competitive, there's this fear of having to stay relevant and marketable. I've seen "coding"," data scientist", "learning language" getting thrown around as if everyone has to be a complete expert in order to stay relevant. Heck, no. From what I've learned, yes they are important but if there's no application, they are as good as obsolete. These newly acquired skills get stashed at the back of your brain, waiting to be forgotten. You kinda just need enough to do what you need (then learn from there) or to properly communicate with others on these topics.

2) The answers are never and will never will be black and white

(FYI. I'm not talking about math here if you think I'm referring to 1+1=2.)

I don't know if it's because of Singaporean's education system or my personal fear to view failure as wasted time, but truly, there's a need to experience that sense of falling short in order to fully understand and appreciate progress. As I've constantly mentioned to myself (excuse the amount of reminders I need to tell myself), there will never be a cookie cutter solution. I've seen it and done it in both my work and personal life, attempting to bring in a "model solution" into a company only to realise that the real world does not work that way, trying to imitate the regimes of people who succeeded in certain things. I somehow always end up falling short or faring worse than I initially did. To a large extent, having an initial set of instructions does help, but allowing yourself to fail and flexible allows for better conclusions (God, sometimes I love that I was an Arts student in uni). As the yogis put it, everyone is on their own journey.

3) Spaced consistency is key

Having that space to breathe and rest allows for sustainability and rekindled motivation. Allow a state complete rest and to work on frivolous things - many have coined this as "self care". Even more so, new and better ideas can even come from here.

To conclude, I guess, as with us physically, the state of mind is ever changing. Be it as it may, there's no one logical answer to answer life's questions. How do we logically answer everything we do/choose? and if we chose to do something and decide that our answers had changed later, should we be ridiculed just because it is not what we initially sought out to do? No. Our external environment is constantly changing, thoughts are constantly evolving, ever changing. If I said something now, perhaps in a few years things may change, just as we gain new knowledge and perspective. Perhaps this is how human kind has progressed, resulting in the undulated views of life across different generations. In all honesty, this conclusion is a tough one for me to swallow. Yet, somehow there is a beauty in it, in a way that you will always have that chance to choose, to rest, to rediscover.. Alright I'm not going to be all philosophical here but the point is, life is a journey not a destination. 

Ok back to watching and reading Coraline theories online and why Chinese women did foot binding in the past (ugh)... 

Goodnight.

Declutter: simple changes I made in my life this year

(I don't really have a proper title for this entry.)

I grew up having loathed the idea of small common sensical changes as if they were all some woo-woo gibberish. I found myself constantly seeking towards the end goal, the big picture yet somehow still falling short of my expectations. Unfocused, ever-changing, unsure. A similar very human experience that one would go through at some point in his/her life. 

As with many this year has been a year of self exploration. I realised how living in the present, being grateful and being self-aware can make a whole world of a difference, especially when it comes tiding through the bad times and the negative thoughts. It still fascinates me how a simple change in the decision you make in your head can create such a ripple effect to the course of decisions you make subsequently. It seems so simple yet somehow I find myself only realising it during my adulthood (heh. late to the game). 

Anyway, upon some reflection, I feel like these were 3 very tiny changes I did that made me so much more whole as a person - sometimes I question how I can be this positive (disclaimer: not every time ok....) lmao.

(1) Hanging out with people who mattered, who radiated positivity and spending quality time with them.

As cliche as it sounds you are the average of the people you mix around with in itself is so true. I felt this pivotal change in my mental well being and outlook when I took the step to be more intentional with the people I hung out with. This felt so silly because it was so simple but it was so life changing. With the right support, bad days can instantly change to moderately okay days, filled with ideas to resolve problems properly and opportunities to make days ahead better. (I low-key hope people around me feel the same way lol.)

Also the quality of time spent with people. I observed many of us (myself included) tending to "multitask" on our phones and conversing, only being 30-60% present when spending time with people, making out to be 80-100% absent. Are we rushing for a text that could wait, checking an email that wasn't urgent or looking at social media for that punch of dopamine? Will it hurt if we spent less time on our phone and be present when we share time with people? In this fast-paced environment, we wait to rush and rush to wait. We disconnect to connect. Perhaps conversations we have would be more meaningful, time spent to be more efficient, and discussions to be be much more fruitful.

(2) Having a consistent hobby

Weird but I never knew how having a hobby can make you a much more interesting person haha. I tend to talk about my work a lot because I find it interesting.. (lol..) but it's nice to also be able to share the things we do out of work. It's mysteriously therapeutic to refine your skills for some reason, especially at one's own pace - sometimes I wish I was little more patient with myself. Additionally, having personal goals with no social obligation to finish it feels so damn liberating ^_^ It permits an open form of escapism from the real world to show the real world. 

I remembered Jing Ting shared an article about how every "skill" in contemporary times has to be a "side hustle" hustle or "monetised", in the midst of it, we lost the true joy of doing something wholeheartedly. Maybe we still are able to do that but only if we are truly immersed in the things we enjoy initially.

(3) Being alone and self acceptance

Self acceptance and learning to be alone. While this is a constant struggle for me, being able to accept myself and feeling comfortable under my own skin gave me more courage and provided clarity in the things I wanted to do. I digress, I feel like a ghost in a horror movie stuck in the real world due to unresolved issues while typing this lol. 

Learning to spend time in moments of full solitude made me think more intently and enjoy the moments of being human. While it definitely intensified feelings of negativity, I think this in itself was a necessity to fight my internal battles that I've kept swept under the carpet for a long time. I learned how to deal with myself. I learn to take the courage walk away from people and things that did not spark joy in my life (this phrase is now permanently associated with Marie Kondo - marketing done right lol).

I remembered Jessica sending me this indie-ish video where a stranger narrated how it's truly like to be alone many years back, I can't remember it exactly but it had a really beautifully craft voice over, I felt it :)

Having said all these, I'm still a work in progress, I'll never stop learning.

Declutter: A Brief Respite with the Sketchbook III

 

Hello weekend, yet another week has passed.

I've been doing my own personal reflecting in my sketchbook lately and it's has been both tedious and therapeutic so far. It's been an avenue for me to be extremely fluid with my thoughts, giving me that liberty to make stupid errors, be unstructured, be a complete mess and go haywire with my thoughts. A space away from the eyes of society. 

Ironically, being able to pen down my thoughts fluidly removes the mental mess I have in my brain. It's weird. I also find myself finding joy in flipping through pages of my sketchbook and seeing how far I've come. It somehow serves as a reminder that both good and bad times come and go, nothing really stays the same unless you think that way. This too shall pass.

There's also something different about writing things down in pen/pencil/watever as compared to just typing words out, the mind somehow comes to a slow. I tend to be more mindful when it comes to physically writing words out. It somehow draws you to be in the present and stay focus - maybe due to the fact it takes more time to write every letter out? There's more intent.

Ok I'm pretty tired of writing this entry already haha and yea what's a sketchbook without some random sketches, here's a few random doodles I've done here and there over the course of October and November :)

Side note, managed to work on some random admin tasks in my life today that I've been putting off lately feels quite nize. Goodnight!

Declutter: back to basics

The period of October had been slightly overwhelming for me. Yet recently in the moment of procrastination I had an epiphany while looking back at past entries in space - i.e. stalking myself on my blog. It's quite interesting how this space has provided manifestations of what worked well and what didn't, a place that accounted my own personal development in terms of my mental well-being. yea, there were a lot of stupid moments, but that's all part of the process right hehe.

Anyway, I decided to look back at what I did at the start of the year and pick up certain practices that had worked really well previously but somehow got lost over the course of the months. It still somewhat blows my mind how a simple change in what you do and how you think can create wonders how productive one can be without burning out.

In summary, here's three things that enabled me to overcome that feeling of being overwhelmed and allowed me to keep pace:

(1) Write down a laundry list of everything you need to do

It can be so daunting at times to see the endless amount of items to do at first but it frees up so space in your mental at that very instant. Creating a mental to-do list can create such unnecessary use of your mental capacity. Having to think about problems that can't be solved at that very moment or just trying to retain the information can be exhausting and it almost amounts to nothing. And at least for me, I have this huge tendency to feel that need to finish working on every task in one-sitting (which obviously isn't possible) lest I miss out on anything. 

Listing every item down frees up so much mental space, enabling one to strategise/cultivate each task can be approached in the most efficient way possible.

As the saying goes, the faintest ink is more powerful than the strongest memory.

(2) Stay in the present, work on each task step by step 

It's always nice to think about the end of the tunnel, but sometimes the end can feel/be pretty far. I have that tendency to think about what's the next task moving forward, getting ahead of myself all the time even before the first step is completed. Somehow the first step never gets completed.. 

This point reminded me about how I should break things into small manageable effortless - something I initially did at the start of the year. It makes tasks seem so easy and effortless, there's really no rhyme or reason to procrastinate. Before you know it, the big tasks gets done through the series of small steps you took to get there. This ted talk sums it up nicely (I have watched this countless times.. as a reminder oops)

(3) Be fully focus and fully at rest when you need to

I think it's always easy to have your mind on run mode on what's the next thing to do, what do we need to do next even in moments of respite and this can be so exhausting. When it is truly time to rest, put that phone away, sit down, relax, read a good book, have some nice coffee/beverage and give yourself a mental break you deserve. Spend proper quality time with someone - you tend to build better relationships and have very meaningful conversations with people when you are fully present ;)

Alright that's it, I enjoyed writing this entry :) back to work~

Declutter: what work life taught me about emotional well-being

I'm currently sitting at the nearby hawker center, 7 minutes walk away from my place here in the heartland, chilling, finishing up a random project my friends decided to take part in, starring into open space - people watching , trying to recover from an anticipated burnout. 

October so far has been consistently high tempo at work; an expanded job scope with constant influx of new information, trying to grasp new knowledge as quickly as possible, battling with time management - all that sort of work stuff. While it's been super productive with the work community being really kind to me, I think my mind is overstimulated lol. 

Upon some reflection and a lot of daydreaming, I feel working has made me more emotionally aware. Perhaps due to the nature of work I'm in? I'm not complaining though haha. 

(Okok yaya I know I keep talking about work but I'm reflecting ok :P) 

In a way, I think I have become more (IRONICALLY..) chill, forgiving and understanding as a person? Of course I have my bad days (well everyone has..) yet overall, I like to think that I've become a little more positive than I used to be. I only wish that I had a personality type that derived energy from socialising with people…. 

Here's three quick takeaways work has taught me in taking care of myself emotionally: 

(1) Putting yourself first 

Sounds selfish but it's perhaps it's the most unselfish thing you can ever do for anyone. Putting yourself first means you're caring about your own physical and mental well-being, taking ownership of what you do and letting others know you're accountable for yourself. 

The people you care about need not constantly worry about you and in some way, you emit good energy to the people around you. You know how emotionally draining it can be to talk to someone who is unhappy all the time.

(2) Learning to listen openly, not be afraid to ask questions 

It pays to be human - anywhere, as a colleague, a friend, etc. Knowing everyone is human and treating them as emotional beings can make an entire conversation genuine and trusting. Attention can be so hard to obtain these days with so much stimuli from social media and with the presence of a phone. Listen intently and ask questions to clarify, it pays to be interested and attentive. While it is true that not everyone would think or treat you likewise, but being kind to yourself makes a world of a difference. 

(3) Everyone is on their own journey 

While the rat race culture is perhaps never going away in this Singaporean society(I for one have partly succumbed to it) I think it's important to know that everyone have different goals and different pursuits. It's so easy to gun down people's goals that could be differently from you or tell others to "suck it up" when they go through difficult times.. Yet everyone's personal struggles are highly individualistic.

People have their bad days, and that's okay - there will be cancelled appointments, missed texts because someone is busy, had a bad day, or need to chill in general and that is totally normal. When complains happen, sometimes people just need to, doesn't mean they're terrible people. Not being idealistic, however, learning to filter out the noise and see the good in people in turn points your outlook to the world to be more positive . 

Yup, ok that's it, gonna chill the rest of this weekend :)

Declutter: 3 Things I've Been Doing Pretty Consistently in 2020

I fall under the category of human beings that never could keep consistent in terms of working on personal goals/tasks that they initially intended to do. But this year, I've kept consistent in some aspects of my personal life. I personally feel that it's a significant breakthrough for myself, being able to be consistent in the things I do and with relative ease! I ain't even mad, I'm impressed!

Here are three things I was never ever consistent about and never in my life, thought I'll ever be in my entire life but somehow managed to be so far:

1) Blogging

Damn, I had always been erratic when it came to blogging, only posting an entry subjected to my mood. This year, I kept a constant stream of content coming in at least once a week. Writing a post a week has worked wonders in many other aspects of my life - I use blogging as a platform to keep myself accountable and to reflect freely, opening up more headspace.

2) Reading

Okay THIS. This is something I wished I did more in my younger days. I never thought in the entire 25 (almost 26) years of my life I would take so much interest in reading. Like, seriously. I could never finish a chapter of a book in my ENTIRE life and this year I have so far finished FOURTEEN books?! WHAT. Even. Abigail, HOW? Here's a list of books I've read so far and I have asterisks those that I highly recommend to the general audience :)

1. Poor Economics - Abhijit Banerjee and Esther Duflo 
2. Flash Boys - Michael Lewis  
3. Atomic Habits - James Clear (*)
4. Billion Dollar Whale - Tom Wright and Bradley Hope 
5. The Charisma Myth - Olivia Fox (*) 
6. Factfulness - Hans, Ola & Anna Rosling (*) 
7. The Bullet Journal Method - Ryder Carroll 
8. The Technology Trap - Carl Frey 
9. Becoming - Michelle Obama 
10. I will Teach You to be Rich - Ramit Sethi 
11. Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life - Albert Liebermann and Hector Garcia 
12. Sapiens - Yuval Noah Harari (*)
13. A Ride of a Lifetime - Robert Iger 
14. Bad Blood - John Carreyrou (*)

3) Digital Declutter

I used to have someone who had countless emails subscriptions left unread that I said I'll get back to later and never did. My desktop was also a mess - filled with icons and shortcuts that I too would get back to later. While I am pretty organised when it came to my profession work, my personal laptop was sub par. While digital clutter seem pretty innocent at the beginning, taking up no tangible space, I personally feel it gets pretty overwhelming to constantly look at in the long run. I end up losing track of what I've done or ought to do because I've ended up misplacing contents that "I'll get back to later". I've since cleaned up both my emails and desktop - every item on my computer now has a "home", things I want to find are never lost and it always takes very little effort to clean up digital clutter once it in a while :)

Side note: I made healthy bibimbap today and it was amazing x) had to share some of my proud moments in photography. Xiamei approves - cooked egg also courtesy of her lol.

Happy Sunday!

Declutter: 3 Things to Feel Grateful About

(pardon my haphazard drawings - I did this super duper quickly hahahah)

The year so far for me has consist of many uncontrollable circumstances, moments of self discovery, self doubt, moments I feel appreciative, moments that I feel restricted, lost and a few instances that I made bigger decisions. As we draw closer to the end of half of this year - amidst the present mess - I thought it would be good to take a quick step back and perhaps do a little moment of being appreciative about what I have at present

(does not consist of all my friends I have male friends too, but most of my friends are super tall i don't know why lol)

1) People around me

I'm not someone who is a super words person but I'm thankful for people in both my personal and professional lives. The ones who have given me countless of opportunities to help me grow, see myself at a different angle. People who are busy but have made it a point to listen and be concern about me while sharing with me about their lives as I listen. I'm thankful for people who understand (understand that I'm a horrible texter too), who inspire me and who share with me stories of their own personal lives. They make me understand and listen better. I'm genuinely happy to see people improving and grow :)

2) Having internalised some habits in me

I've havent been extremely disciplined with my habit tracker. It's partly because I want to ensure that tracking my habits gives me that sense of accomplishment rather than going through motion. Interestingly, some habits have stuck with me well as I continue to let loose and be more carefree when it comes to my day to day living. Here's some examples:

•  My morning routine consists of me reading my book
• I continue to do my runs, even on days I don't want to, it's really weird. 
• I continue to make my be and clean my room even if I'm super lazy to, extremely automatic lol

3) Learning to be curiously aware

Learning anything new is always a tough cookie. But being curiously aware and admitting my ignorance have been so so helpful. I genuinely admit to myself I have a hard time trying to understand something rather than "pretending" what I don't know. The sense of achievement that comes with it when you finally understand is amazing! While I'm still trying to unlearn certain a cautiousness from a few terrible teachers and managers I had in the past, I'm pretty excited to work on this part of me :)

So yep, that's it. Another bite-size entry to remind myself to keep pace and carry on. Typing this as the sun goes up while listening to the jazz & coffee playlist on Spotify x)

Declutter: My View on Approaching Personal Spending

I've always been someone that's pretty prudent when it comes to money, in fact I like saving money. Sometimes I can get too carried away.

As I make bigger spending decisions (more on that next time) and do a monthly cycle on my expenditure, I've been forced me to think deeper on the current take on my personal finances. I don't really like using the word "finance" because I'm definitely not an expert and people tend to associate the word with something that is seemingly complicated.

Questions I ask myself a lot are: When is the right time to spend and enjoy? Are we really going to save only for retirement? To what extent do we strike a balance?


Like with all things, while there is no cookie cutter solution (such a consulting comment :-P), there are inevitably general rules you follow. From there, you make tweaks to ensure that the rules works for you.

Here are some personal rules I've made for myself in order for me to enjoy my hard earn money in a more guilt-free manner:

1. Money is meant to make your life better, not to make you suffer: I used to be someone who save every dime and penny, worrying about never having enough to spend for my future. But sometimes reasons you pay that extra cost is because you want to remove that extra burden to save you the hassle/ time  (i.e. administrative costs or eg. taking a cab vs a public transport). Time to money: time to rest and work on your mental well-being, time to invest in up-skilling yourself.


2. I don't complicate my personal finance when it comes to expenditure  investing and insurance.
• Spending: I tend to just set a budget every month and just spend within that budget - that's it. 
• Investing: When it comes to investing, while going into funds/equity (whatever you call it) and high yield accounts are important, the  biggest asset is your salary. Think about it, your experience in the workplace is value and it is the most certain that yields the highest y-o-y % increment that you can ever obtain. If you are spending another 8 hours a day at home trying to see what's the next big investment - there is so much opportunity cost where u could have used the thing to time to perhaps learn a hobby, spend time with people whom you care about and enjoy life in general. Why worry about your investment all the time - unless that brings you joy of course. In essence, take some time to research on investing but not all of your time.
• Insurance: I view insurance as a warranty on my life to pay off my liabilities: it is a 100% cost and I don't mix assets and insurance together.


3. I don't spend on things I don't really care about but I spend on ton on things that I see value in: I'm not a fan of shopping in general, but when I do get my moment of retail therapy, I don't worry about feeling guilting about how much I spend at one go. The items I buy are usually not impulsive purchases and items that I tend to have a lot of use out of (sometimes too long)

3 Things on How Hobbies Make You More Productive

As mentioned countless times in my previous entries, I've been substituting my running with my childhood past time: the visual arts - drawing & painting. It's been quite a while since I've been so consistently with marking art, actually I don't think I've ever been this consistent before. There were definitely days I picked up a pencil, pen or brush and feel completely uninspired, but in one way or another - perhaps because mostly of boredom, I somehow find myself going back to painting over these past couple of months. It's weird but I guess it's a good thing.

That said, while many articles have emphasised how having a hobby is good for relaxation and taking time away from work in be that state of flow. I feel that there's more to that. Personally, it has helped me quite considerably when it comes to mental well-being and increased productivity. I like setting personal goals for myself in my hobby and what I gain from consistent practice has subconsciously translated to other more social or mundane parts of my own life.

I want to mention 3 key things that having a consistent hobby have taught me during this period. I hope that it would somehow get someone inspired to stay connected to his/her hobby when they feel uninspired from time to time :)

1) It teaches you patience - 

Learning is always hard, but somehow the state of flow in hobby teaches you how to press on. Whenever I get into the flow state while painting - especially when it gets painfully long to complete a piece - its therapeutic effects somehow pushes you on to keep focus and to refine until you are completely satisfied. 

If not, you tend to try again!

2) It allows you be unafraid to experiment - 

It negates the effects of having people's expectation. It's your hobby - no expectations are placed on you other than yourself.  

Sometimes when it comes to delivering a project for work, you're in the watchful eyes of people (maybe it's just the introvert in me talking) and you're pretty incentivised to present safest solution. Having a hobby removes this expectation, allowing you to explore a thousand methods out there and eventually find out what suits you :) I think this eventually translates to how you tackle issues outside of your hobbies too! 

For me, I'm still experimenting with different art styles and mediums but I'm starting to find a certain style I like. 

3) It makes you more resourceful -

Be it playing a game for your past time, a sport or expanding the creative side of you. Having that consistent hobby somehow creates ways to make you as resourceful as possible in order to find what you like best and how to practise best, or in gaming - what's the best stats to add lol. 

This resourcefulness somehow makes your hobby more meaningful. With the internet and interest groups, you seek how the best way of doing things, fail but somehow try again, research about the equipment, the characters the history about for the betterment of your understanding. 

--

Suddenly thought of a salty moment that someone said I had no eye for design cause' she didn't like the way I edited pictures on my Linkedin post. Pft. Lol. okay bye.

(I'm still refining my preferences and style but it's been a pretty fun process so far :))

Another 30-day Challenge Done and Dusted!

Aaaaand that's a wrap for my 30-day challenge - a huge sigh of relief for me. dang, doing the 30-day challenge TWICE (how even!) is admittedly super difficult on top of all the other essential commitments out there.

I have yet to upload all of my works on Instagram @duringtryingtimes - I'm trying spruce things up on my Instagram - but I've already put it out there on Facebook.

As mentioned on Facebook, I actually only completed the final 12 pieces of my additional 30-day challenge on the second last day of the circuit breaker period - on a Sunday - which resulted in a very terrible backache.  I stopped working on my 30-day challenge on day 18, the 12 other works were done solely driven by the aim to complete the entire 30 because I knew I needed a break. I'm glad I made the call lest I burn out.

If I had any takeaway from this, it is that it goes to show how sometimes you have to listen to your state of mind and additionally, how having an objective or deadline in mind can go a long way - that weird sense of urgency that drives you to finish what you started. While I am still a huge believer of small steps, the last-minute strategy worked for me this time. If I've learned something from this or something from my life experiences thus far, there is never one way/one model solution to finish what you started, sometimes you have to adapt and improve on the best approach based on circumstances - we are after all a work in progress.

Anyway, similar as before, here are my favourite pieces :)

Declutter: About Falling Behind and Feeling like it's Too Late

(me representing by the most cliche thoughts of the century)

We're almost half way through 2020 and what a year it has been! This week, I took a step back to reflect what I've accomplished thus far since the start of this year. I boldly admit that I did accomplished quite a fair bit on what I've sort out to do.

Over the last few weeks, I chose to cut back on non-essential tasks and give myself a mental break. I spent much time talking to friends - some that I've been keeping in touch with and also those that I've haven't spoken with in months or even year. COVID-19 really does wonders to your social life and in some way, I feel glad for that. Even more, I feel happy to hear how far people have been progressing and improving in their own day to day lives :)!

Because of that, I've been pretty inspired. They reminded me that it's never too late to start on something (I need reminders and a support group too!). We tend to compare ourselves and how there are already so many talented individuals out there, it's probably too late for us to start. We always wished we started earlier. Ironically, we go through this vicious cycle that it's too late to start because we never get any younger.

Here are a few examples of what my friends did:

• at 24, a friend of mine made the choice to do a profession that is totally unrelated to her degree (accounting) and she found something she enjoyed doing and I could really see how much happier she is now.
• at 24, a friend of mine made it a point to learn ukulele and she's now confident enough to share her progress with others
• at 27, a friend of mine picked up mandarin and within 2 years, is fluent in the language in both conversational and business
• in his 40s, an ex-client of mine decided to run a marathon and never looked back - you can hear more of this story here!

These stories made me reflect. If I had a story of my own to be proud of, it was that I was a total bum during I was in primary and secondary school days. I only studied what I liked. While I did end up grinding it out in my junior college years, I think I wouldn't have found so much joy and value in learning if I just went through the motion in my earlier years to get "good grades". 

This curiosity and value in learning somehow translated positively to my days in university and even now in my professional life. I made sure I picked things I enjoyed doing to feel that sense of joy when I learned. In some way, it gave me an appreciation in what I do.

I'll never get why we as humans tend to put ourselves down so quickly, before we start or reach a milestone but falling behind does help you to reflect to find appreciation and the endurance in investing time and effort in the things you do. 

I guess it is a timely reminder that sometimes taking a step back to listen brings you two steps forward :)

This ted talk explains perfectly about how falling behind can get you ahead.

Declutter: A Brief Respite with the Sketchbook II

I've been feeling a little bit more jaded lately - probably because of the entire circuit breaker saga -and been finding myself painting and sketching a little bit more than usual. I think I've been bit more experimental than I used to be, learning to derive joy in the details rather than scrummaging through due to the limitations of time, it's nice but sometimes it gets a little bit boring lol. 

It feels like this circuit breaker focused too much on the physical side of health and have disregarded the social and mental well-being part of life. While I would say I'm pretty blessed to find things I enjoy doing - though it can get really aimless now and then - I can't help but wonder what others are feeling to keep occupied - I mean other than baking and working out of course.

and it's back to another weekend that doesn't feel like the weekends.

Good afternoon, Saturday.

Declutter: A Brief Respite with the Sketchbook

To be completely frank: at this point in time, I really miss going outdoors, travelling, having a social life (that is not virtual), taking walks without having to wear a mask. I started getting lethargic following a routine and miss some bits of spontaneity when it comes to going out. I decided to translate all these into an old hobby of mine - sketching landscapes. 

I used to scoff art and hated it for being one of my "talents" because in school, it's always about sports and non-visual arts. While I did eventually do some form of sport in school and found joy in it even til now (I'm really bummed about how the sundown marathon isn't going to happen this week), art really stood the test of time. 

It's now where I find solace, develop patience and appreciate the little details. It's funny how somehow within my life so far, everything comes into full circle. I do not really market myself as the "artsy" type - there are so many talented individuals out there - but I think I'm doing pretty okay with it. I guess in some way it brings me joy to a state of flow that allows me to forget time and space. 

I think what they say is true about having a niche in the active, creative and work side of your life, it really works out pretty well.

Additionally, it's also really nice to see progress/how far you've come looking at old sketchbooks - I think I started this "hobby" in 2014? Those sketches looked really bad as compared to what I'm doing now. haha.

Declutter: Keeping Productivity Sustainable

Wew - what a week it has been for me! Work can get pretty hectic and I thought it would be an appropriate time to post an entry about keeping productivity sustainable - in essence, staying motivated. It serves as a reminder to myself to keep pace over the long run. I thought it would be nice to share some pointers of what had helped me :)

Note that these ideas are not by me at all and are taken from the creator of the bullet journal. I summarised them in my own words.

1) Defining your goals, sprints and tasks: this is primary step - ensure they are quantifiable:

• Goals: the overall milestone
• Sprint: a broken down goal that can be done within a sustained period of time. The duration should be focused and contained
• Task: simple steps that adds up to the equation to complete the sprint
• Finishing each task keeps you going, that allows you to finish a sprint and ultimately enables you to finish the goal

2) Breakdown your goals into sprints

• Instead of using the traditional method of trying to sustain motivation over a long haul, sprints keep your motivation going - we're looking for as little willpower needed to sustain motivation.
• Furthermore, sprints give you small breaks and time to reflect on your goals such as how to work on things better, what's currently value adding and what's not.
• I totally recommend break-sprints - meaning you work on other projects/hobby you enjoy before getting back to the next sprint - it really helps clear the mind.

3) Ask yourself 5-whys:

• I found this is extremely useful for me. Sometimes we need to ask ourselves what's the intrinsic motivation of these goals - i.e. what's the point of all this? 
• Oftentimes, when we reason ourselves the first time, reasons end up pretty superficial or politically correct. But asking the second, third and forth "why" typically drives you to think a little deeper and more connected to your tasks.
• I recommend working on this by saying out loud or writing it down - doing these consolidate your thoughts better.

Happy Saturday!

3 Lessons in 3 Different Aspects from Books

(I really read e-books, mostly)

Since the start of January to April, I've completed reading the most number of books I had ever read in the 25+ years of existence on Earth - I ain't even mad.

For me, reading has been a life-changing hobby - I wonder why I lacked the tenacity to pick up a book when I was younger. I thought it would nice to give some thought on the books I've read so far and reflection of a few key points I've learnt in simple bullet points: 

1. Mental 
2. Social 
3. Economic 

Mental

1. What you do compounds: take small steps - I think I've emphasised on this enough at this point 
2. Time is your friend: everything takes time to achieve mastery. There is never too early nor never too late. The time is now. 
3. If something is not deemed valuable, don't do it: however, that said, know that boring does not equate to not valuable 

Social

1. No one is perfect, thus not every comment/advise given is perfect either, despite good intent: learn to understand why, the origin of the answer. Take in merits and politely dismiss demerits
2. You are not here to please anyone but yourself: sounds selfish yet if you take care of yourself, people whom you care about need not worry. Additionally, you create good influence 
3. Saying yes to something means saying no to something else: opportunity costs. If you say yes to one request means you're saying no to a multitude of other opportunities. Make wise choices. 

Economic

1. Be present and anticipate: encompasses all 3 aspects. As with technology/business and its growth, things can get unpredictable - the future is unpredictable. Lamenting about missed opportunities gets you nowhere. The time is now. 
2. We tend to be myopic: sometimes we get caught up with the media and society, sometimes we get caught up with the next shiny new thing, we end up being overwhelmed by our own emotions. That said, human nature and emotions tend to withstand the test of time and history open repeats itself. Take a step back, think long term and count your blessings. 
3. Stay open to new ideas: do not scoff off failures. Everything starts off with some form of failure. We do not feel the effects of the changing world until it impacts our way of life. We are all stubborn people regardless of generation. Be open to new ideas and new ways of doing things!

How is it Okay to Suck at Something New

How it is okay to suck at something new - a continuation from my previous entry about getting started on a new hobby/project - here's a quick summary in bullet points:

• This can apply to learning a new skill, hobby, even building relationships with people around you or developing a new perspective.
• If we do not start, we end up not starting or giving up altogether. 
• The trick is to take it in small convenient steps. 
• The best time to start doing something is always the present 

1. It's alright to suck at something new, do not be embarrassed whenever you make mistakes:  Mistakes are where people learn the most. 
• If someone scorns you for making mistakes, especially at the very beginning, know that these are not valuable inputs. 
2. When learning gets tough, always do a quick check in with yourself: These are two things that help me personally - 
• (1) ask myself why am I doing this 
• (2) look back at your past works once in a while to see how far you've come and how much you have improved. This keeps me going. 
3. Always know that it is okay to try something new, do it, and realize you don't love it and move along: The is only way you'd discover what you enjoy - by learning something new for a substantial amount of time. I feel like too many of times people tend to put down a person's attempt too quickly by saying they eventually give up mid way. 
• However, the thing is you kinda have to give it (or anything) a go before you truly know whether it's something you love or dislike/hate. 
• And if you do not enjoy doing it, you don’t have to go through a endure going through some kind of a noble martyr doing something just to prove to people you can succeed and be consistent - it is your life not theirs.

Getting Started on a New Hobby/Project

Whenever we think about starting a new hobby/project, we tend to get overwhelmed.

In one of my favourite articles written by Tim Wu in the NY times called "in Praise of Mediocrity" (link), he mentioned:

"I’ve come to think, that so many people don’t have hobbies: We’re afraid of being bad at them. Or rather, we are intimidated by the expectation — itself a hallmark of our intensely public, performative age (…) Our “hobbies,”(…) have become too serious, too demanding, too much an occasion to become anxious about whether you are really the person you claim to be."

As ironic and cliché as it may be, the hardest bit about having a new hobby is taking the first step. To be more specific, taking the first step proper. Whenever we get started, we tend to overwhelm ourselves with the expectation that we need to be skillful and placed in a perfect environment to deem respected to pursue it. This is in itself extremely ironic, mastery can only be acquired overtime with consistency alongside trial and error.

If we don't, we end up not starting or giving up altogether.

The trick is to take it in small convenient steps.

Here's the real deal on how to get started on something new:
(I'll be using art and exercise as an example)

•  Know it is okay to suck at something new - it is new, after all. 
• We typically give ourselves excuses before we can even start: we don’t have the right materials, it's not the right time etc. Thing is, the best time to try something is now and with whatever you have
• We should think of having great equipment after 

• Have a goal but make everyday goals so small and easy it's almost impossible to not do it. At the beginning, give yourself a hard stop right after completing, do not do additional. 
• Art: I'll never work on another painting that day no matter how much I want to in order to look forward to working on it the next day 
• Exercise: Taking a 5-minute walk or run and have a hard stop there until the next day comes. 
• This way piques your interest and motivation by allowing yourself to be challenged without being overwhelmed 

• Make your environment work for you 
• Art: I placed my drawing materials on my desk so that I'm reminded to paint everyday and it also makes it so convenient for me that it's hard to say no to it 
• Exercise: I either plan a comfortable route around my neighbourhood or do stretches at home without having too many additional process to think before I even get started.

It is only when you get started consistently where you try to modify it. As Picasso had said ""Learn the rules like a pro, so you can break them like an artist."

Here's a visual representation on how I'm working on my 30-day challenge (link) - a mini art project whilst having we're having our circuit breaker moment in Singapore:

Ultimately, the idea is to enjoy the process :) it's a hobby and your own personal project!

Have fun!