Wit's End

it's week 9 of my last semester, and I'm almost at wit's end. The constant influx of projects occurring almost every week, the five hours a sleep everyday and fortnight presentations alongside the constant pressures to find a full time job has been extremely demoralising. It's almost the end of the semester but I already feel like giving up.

Is this what work life is going to be like? I mean, when is this even going end? I tell myself it's ending but then the hustle is going to come in when work comes.. Even if I get an awesome job, then what? 9pm nights everyday?

I feel like I'm constantly seeking for external validation that I'm good enough, trying to worm through the crowd to shine, I don't feel good enough I don't feel pretty enough I'm not lucky enough. I feel terrible. Even right now I feel afraid to implore my feelings because it shows a sign that I can't tolerate stress or pressures, it's that constant fear of falling out.

some would even say that i'm already in such a good position, what is there to even complain about. but to be honest, if you were to be put in this position, will you not feel the same way?

i'm tired.